kurtsh

Hawaii's legendary "Matsumoto Shave Ice" is opening on Saturday, June 6th in the Irvine Spectrum at Ryoko Rain in California! See you at there! 839 Spectrum Center Drive - https://maps.app.goo.gl/SqPAtJqQrivL4ih3A?g_st=ac #matsumotoshaveice #irvinespectrum #ryokorain #hawaii

@kurtsh Peronsally, the funniest part of the graphic was the "78 in the middle lane" because, uh, I guess if I kill the turbos, downshift to 4th gear & see CHP lurking around side an 18-wheeler... mebbe? 🤣

Meiselas: Katie Miller has been posting about you. I want to give you the opportunity right now to respond. What do you want to say to her? Paulina Mangubat, Content and Creative Director for @thedemocrats: I want Katie Miller to know that her husband is an […] [Original post on mastodon.social]

<courtesy of @charlotteclymer> Last night, CBS News awarded the Mike Wallace Memorial Scholarship to Santiago Campos, a high school journalist. ...In accepting, he took the time to condemn the direction of CBS News to much surprise & applause from the […] [Original post on mastodon.social]

I will crack my 401k to Gofundme a 'Karen Rehab' facility in Orange County, CA... right now. 😂 #karens #rehab #humor

We look forward to you filling CA state's coffers, you MAGA insurrectionist traitors! ✅ California to impose 100% tax on Trump's January 6 'slush fund,' governor says […] [Original post on mastodon.social]

Spencer Pratt doesn't even LIVE in Los Angeles. ▫️ He didn't have home insurance when his house burned down ▫️ He spent $10M preparing for the "Mayan Apocalypse" ▫️ He thinks the Sandy Hook massacre was a hoax ▫️ He current online business sells 'energy […] [Original post on mastodon.social]

Anthony Jeselnik knew over a decade ago, how big of a douchebag Spencer Pratt was, but apparently today's Bravo/Reality TV addicted morons apparently missed the memo. #spencerpratt #anthonyjeselnik #trump

Rocket, our neighborhood raccoon, came by our back doorstep for snacks this evening. He's a chill dude w/ no aggro. Just wanders by, looking for his next meal. #raccoons

Man, I remember my 20s. 😜 #vegas #downtown

“Scott Jennings accuses us of having Trump Derangement Syndrome. Scott Jennings has Trump Dicksucking Syndrome. He can’t manage to call out or hold Donald Trump accountable for any wrongdoing. That’s the cult of MAGA” - Michael Fanone #trump #scottjennings

After being told to stop harassing women, Fat Putin seems to have a new fascination... (courtesy of the Daily Show with Ronnie Chieng) #trump #dailyshow #ronniechieng

2 laps, 5 miles... nothing more riveting than the Oscar Mayer Wienie 500 at the Indianapolis Motor Speedway. Go Seattle Dog! #oscarmayer #racing https://www.msn.com/en-us/sports/general/rain-or-shine-a-wiener-will-be-crowned-at-wienie-500-on-carb-day/ar-AA23EOE9

Los Angeleno checking in: Can vouch for the hilarious condition of Fat Putin's star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. #trump #hollywood

Epic rizz... medieval player. 😜 #smooth #huzzah

In other news, Trump Industries has a new product for all you morons that bought a Trump Phone: #trump

Professor is right. Pratt is an absolute tool & the Bravo TV boobs that fangirl over him are equally intellectually stunted. #pratt #LosAngeles

Wait... Elon lied? And a Cybertruck incel believed him? ▶️ Driver intentionally drove Cybertruck into North Texas lake to use vehicle's "Wade Mode", police say - CBS Texas https://www.cbsnews.com/texas/news/cybertruck-lake-grapevine-texas-5-19-2026/ #elonmusk #tesla #cybertruck

The MAGA asshats of MMA/WWE keep running these dumb grifts & the meatheads, dropouts & incels of America keep getting suckered into watching them. Here's the entire Rousey/Carano "fix" or "thing" or whatever it was.

Spencer Pratt is a continual f-ck up who's never run anything & literally burned out his last hustle. So his next hustle is you, Los Angeles. Take it from Brad Wollack. #LosAngeles #Mayor

Here’s the video of the attorney defending the Igor Lytvynchuk, the douchebag that threw a large rock at Lani, a beloved, endangered monk seal in Maui. #hawaii #IgorLytvynchuk #lani #monkseal #animalcruelty

Shaq had himself announced as, Shaquille I-hate-Charles-Barkley O'Neal at his LSU graduation. 😂 ▶️ Shaquille O’Neal Trolls Charles Barkley While Graduating From LSU - Newsweek […] [Original post on mastodon.social]

This week in TACO, CNN showed a "before & after" of Trump’s responses after visiting China. Sure his brain is guacamole... but he's still a greedy, ego-driven, simpleton racist so all the other greedy, ego-driven, simpleton racists in America will continue to worship him. #trump #china #taco #cnn

Remember how Robert Kelly & his kids going viral from their interruption during his BBC interview? Wanna see those same kids now, 7yrs later? #bbc #robertkelly #viralvideo

Andy Serkis hopping onto the chair to read Trump's tweets as Gollum is simply <chef's kiss>. #trump #serkis #gollum #LateShow #StephenColbert

I feed squirrels. They come to our back porch to eat everyday but this has to be the largest squirrel I've ever seen. I call him Rocket. #squirrels #raccoons

Rod Stewart: “It was superb, absolutely superb you put that rat bag in his place." #rodstewart #kingcharles

Dear God almighty. Try not to roll your eyes, GenX, as these kids attempt to write in cursive on #JimmyKimmelLive.

Check your crazy self... because there's always someone crazier.

Broadcasted live, the camera man totally forgot he was at work for a second. #skysports #humor

2 noodles enter... 1 noodle leaves! #testyourmight #noodlecombat #humor

Megyn Kelly responds to GOP Senator Rick Scott of Florida (not pictured in this video). ...never thought I'd be reposting Megyn Kelly but here we are. #trump #iran #megynkelly #rickscott

Trump calls the confederate traitor Robert E Lee "the best general" & thinks he should have won the American Civil War, because of course he does. Trump voters: This is your fault. #trump #traitors

“The 80s Called” RadioShack’s 2014 Super Bowl spot “brought out icons like Hulk Hogan, ALF, and Chucky, storming a dusty old store to reclaim their era, all set to Loverboy’s “Working for the Weekend.” #80s genx #radioshack #superbowl

TIL, along Route 66, a flatbed Ford sits on a corner in Winslow, Arizona permanently as a tribute to the Eagles song, Take It Easy. ✅ This Is The Most Hospitable Town In Arizona https://www.worldatlas.com/cities/this-is-the-most-hospitable-town-in-arizona.html #eagles #arizona #takeiteasy #music

And the Oscar goes to... #wolfs #bradpitt #georgeclooney #humor

Hey Fat Loser? Ask your country if ReZyne is right for you. #trump #jimmykimmellive #humor

Groom surprises his bride with the man who carries her son’s heart. 🥺 #organdonor #donorssavelives

Ryan & Rocky promote "Project Hail Mary". Try not to laugh. 😁 #projecthailmary #RyanGosling #rocky #humor

Mom dropped "Deez Nuts" during Fast Money on Family Feud & Steve Harvey practically hyperventilated. 🤣 #humor #familyfeud

Rep. Jason Crow (D-CO) asked famed drunkard, Pete Hegseth, about his 'advisor' Timothy Parlatore: Jason Crow: "He travels with you, yes? Pete Hegseth: "Uh - " "It's on Instagram, just say yes." "Yes." 😂 #hegseth #trump #jasoncrow

The moment Christopher Lloyd turned into Jim Ignotowaki. (From the Taxi episode, The Road Not Taken, premiered 44 years ago today.) #christopherlloyd #taxi

30sec of Triumph the Insult Comic Dog pooping all over the GOP's biggest losers at the White House Correspondents Dinner. Full video in link below: ▶️ Triumph Roasts RFK Jr., Hegseth, and Karoline Leavitt at the WHCD | The Daily Show […] [Original post on mastodon.social]

Weijia Jiang, CBS News White House Correspondent, announces Fat Loser is doing a press conference 30min after the supposed assassination attempt. Everyone in the room laughs & even she chuckles, collects herself & has to clarify that it's not a joke. Which of course it does ends up being. #trump

"Hakuna matata, fluff face!" 🤣 #humor

A Trump quote without his voice or face. This is unedited & 100% accurate, taken from the Healthcare Affordability Event on April 23, 2026. ("My Crowd Was Bigger", courtesy of decodingfoxnews) #trump

Neil deGrasse Tyson on Artificial Intelligence: 1. I love AI & been using it for decades. It's scary to thowe not familiar with it - but it's NOT new. 2. AI does mundane, repetitive work & it does it quickly. Let it. 3. It truly makes the impossible, possible […] [Original post on mastodon.social]

TRUMP: I'm not a rapist. I didn't rape anybody O'DONNELL: Oh, you think he was referring to you (c/o Aaron Rupar: https://www.threads.com/@aaron.rupar/post/DXnP3sZCUvA) #trump #rapist

Fascinating how the audience didn't scatter at the WH Correspondents' Dinner when "shots [were] fired," ...meanwhile, the Secret Service took 3-5 business days to wander over & move a reluctant-looking loser from the stage. #whcd #trump #phoningitin

Still my favorite social media ad for Project Hail Mary. #rocky #projecthailmary #humor

Donald Trump files lawsuits often. Notably, he has never sued his niece, Mary Trump, for defamation over her public claims about him. Listen as Mary talks about the similarities between Trump and her grandfather's dementia, memory loss & impulse control issues. #trump #marytrump #fredtrump

OMG... introducing Dora the Destroyer! 🤣 #humor #deadpool #doratheexplorer

Your reminder that 6 years ago today, at the height of the Covid-19 pandemic, Trump was so dumb, he asked if disinfectant could be injected into the body to “knock it out.” #covid19 #pinesol

Nick Saban. Haven't been a fan of Alabama football, but damn if these aren't sage words. #nicksaban

Dude took his pregnant wife’s texts & used AI to turn them into a pop punk song. And it's a banger. 🤘🤣 (Credit: withethanlap on TT) #ai #texts #humor

Doug Wilson, Christ Church senior pastor and Christian nationalist movement leader, believes: ▫️ women shouldn't vote individually ▫️ supports repealing the 19th Amendment ▫️ says the Bible prohibits women from church or government leadership He has hundreds […] [Original post on mastodon.social]