This year for Valentine’s Day, our toddler whacked his mother in the head so hard that it made *me* look good. Mostly just in comparison to him, and can’t rule out her head injury as a factor — but either way, what a naughty little wingman.

My child may never know what it means to be a “spoony bard,” & neither may his mother, and neither may you, but it’s from Final Fantasy IV and the point is I’m spending time with my him instead of playing video games, and as a man, I believe that entitles me to some form of medal or parade, yes?

Don’t tell his mom, but I’m secretly training my kid to be the Coyote who actually takes out his Road Runner. ACME discipline. Real-world physics. Maybe no TNT. 🧨

And people said I was a fool, A FOOL, to make my baby stay up all night watching The Chair Company on a loop.

A tired toddler is a lot like jazz: loopy, hard to follow, and I could listen to it go on and on—but I get why people find it annoying.

The key to toddler meditation? No expectations.* *Arguably also the key to adult meditation.

Next to bedtime, I’d have to say that the hardest part of being a father is probably just any time that his mother leaves me alone with him. Thank God, she doesn’t trust me too much or this would be effing impossible.

As a millennial father, I feel it’s my duty to end each night by imparting one drop of foundational life wisdom gleaned from all those hours spent with my best and only childhood friends, the X-Men. Tonight’s lesson: “people fear what they don’t understand.”

I know the Adam and Eve story isn’t meant to be taken literally, but it really does feel like men got there first when they were handing out gender roles. Like Adam had already given all the predators badass names and was like, “Great first day.

Slo-mo is great because before it you had to just imagine what it was like to be a cheerleader for a jeering team of whale demons on the moon.

Providers are often reimbursed by Medicare below their expenses, which makes it harder for our healthcare systems to provide care to our communities in CA-19. That’s why I helped introduce a bipartisan bill to make critical reforms, including indexing reimbursements to inflation.

Meteorologist Scot Haney says today could make this stretch an official heat wave. https://www.wfsb.com/2026/05/19/technical-discussion-record-heat-storm-threat-prompt-first-alert-weather-days/ 

EuroLeague Round 10: Huge win for Olympiacos #euroleague #basketball #nbauk #nbaeurope #euro

The Sega Saturn bootleg sampler

dumbest thing that’s ever made me cry, likely to be followed by a dozen more dumb things re: KFB that are gonna make me cry today

#children #childhood #parenting #parents #lol #funny #humor #jokes #comedy #mother #mom #nostalgia #learning #teaching #dad #father #comedian #standup #show #horror #kids #family #writer #crazy #prank #stunt #health #healthy #wellness #love #therapy #women #poetry #mothersday #literary #sick #horror

Welcome Jim Ross to the commentary desk for this AEW Continental Championship Match! Watch #AEWDoN LIVE on HBO Max PPV

"...Israeli prosecution informed... burial took place on 29 October 2024, following an earlier Supreme Court ruling in August that authorized the continued withholding of the child’s body... Elian was killed on February 5, 2024, by Israeli Border Police at the entrance to al‑‘Eizariya..."

Vida loves her pets and started laughing at the look I got when I stopped 😹 #givemeshelter #givemesheltersf #sfcats #sanfranciscocats

NEWS: Netanyahu tell 60 minutes Trump wants to “go in there” and get the uranium out of Iran. Meanwhile Israeli strikes kill 85 people over the weekend. @meidastouch.com

🛍️ Regata Masculina Brasil Core Streetwear Ribana Canelada Academia Treino ~De R$ 50,00~ 💥 *Por R$ 29,90* 🛒 Compre aqui 👉 s.shopee.com.br/8fOhhIl0Kt ⚠️ *Promoção sujeita à alteração de preço e estoque do site* #publi

Happy #caturday

Here’s its placement on the website, for context:

Hot Pink Rhododenrons - #pnw #flowers #garden #springtime

A little slideshow for Renee Nicole Good. Justice For Renee

#OTD in 2024, The red flags were thrown before the first lap of the iconic event had even been completed after a huge collision between Sergio Perez’s Red Bull and the two Haas cars of Kevin Magnussen and Nico Hulkenberg 💥 #F1 #MonacoGP | May 26, 2024

This ultrasonic cleansing device uses high-frequency vibrations to gently lift away dirt, oil, blackheads, and dead skin—revealing smoother, brighter skin after every use 😍 👉 Shop now at rizabeautytools.com #BeautyTools #DeepCleanse #BlackheadRemover #GlowSkin

What's the perfect plant or flower for your mom? Afiya Francisco shares blooms and plants that anchor a distinct "mom mood" @annettehamm.bsky.social FULL INTERVIEW: www.chch.com/morning-live...

Ignasi Fernández, Professors de Secundària: "El dia clau pot ser avui o demà. Hauria d'haver estat ahir però el govern no va estar a l'altura." https://3catinfo.social/rzj #Matins3Cat

yeah i'd wanna end it all too if i got screwed over like that #sonicracingcrossworlds #sega

#freepalestine

about time. looking forward to all who orchestrated and participated in the persecution of Trump for ten years get what they deserve. @EricLDaugh 🚨 BREAKING: The DOJ has just launched a CRIMINAL investigation into E. Jean Carroll for PERJURY in her deranged lawsuits against Donald Trump

Yesterday, RNIB handed in their Out of Sight petition, calling for better provision of rehabilitation services to blind and partially sighted people. With an incredible 48,484 signatures, the petition was handed in following a cane walk, which included blind athlete and public speaker Rob Sears.

⭕ Destruction massive dans les habitations civiles et les infrastructures de la ville de #Habboush, dans le Sud du #Liban, à la suite d'attaques #Israéliennes. #Quds-News-Network

One more. See y'all tonight. 📺 NBA on Prime 🎙️ 97.1 The Ticket It’s been 18 YEARS since the #DetroitPistons made the Conference Finals 👀 Detroit NEEDS THIS 🙏#DetroitBasketball 🏀

We are cooling down a bit into this weekend. I've got your latest forecast & when we might see rain again below! #arwx #ARStormTeam

MY BESTIE IS ON HER WAY AND I HAVENT SEEN HER SINCE 2022 CHAT LET US CLAP 💖💖💖

Almond Joy Brownies using extra Halloween Candy Sensational Chewy Brownie #HalloweenCandy #Brownies #Coconut #BakingIdeas #EasyRecipe More treats at lizellyn.com/treats/

Sai appeared on ITV Border last week, advocating for greater support for students and the education sector in Scotland. She highlighted the challenges facing college and university students, particularly those from disadvantaged backgrounds.

✨ Flashback to August 18, 1973! ✨ Queen of Soul & Style, Diana Ross, crowned her dazzling solo career by soaring to #1 on the US charts with the unforgettable hit "Touch Me in the Morning" 🌟🎶. #DianaRoss #TouchMeInTheMorning #MusicLegend #VintageVibes #QueenOfSoul #TimelessMusic

#trump #oil #explore #fyp #BreakingNewsUSA Full story: https://jqjo.com/2026-05-12/us/Economy/fr/bs/Trump-rejette-le-plan-de-paix-:-le-pétrole-dépasse-les-100-$-alors-que-l'inflation-choque-Wall-Street/1273775

Wait, what!? Happy Birthday, Lene! I hope you had a lovely day <3

The Bible is a Unified Theory of Everything

Don't fall for the daily distractions. The Trump/Epstein/Maxwell scandal matters. All day, every day, across every platform, let's post: RELEASE THE EPSTEIN FILES!

WATCH: Elizabeth May is sounding the alarm: C-15 could allow ministers to bypass federal laws outside the Criminal Code for “national interest” projects. If that sounds like a threat to accountability, it’s because it is.

How did Iran get so good at frying trump in these Lego videos? 👍👍👍 "You need the market to drop Need the oil to crash Then you buy at the bottom Flip it for cash Iran still here, The Strait still closed Fake clown exposed... Decompose." #Iran #lego #Trump #reel #reels #video

I just like saying CANDY in that tone 🍬

In an era defined by escalating geopolitical conflict & renewed nuclear brinkmanship, IST’s #CATALINK offers a solution. In a new video, former NATO DSG Rose Gottemoeller presents #CATALINK, a blueprint for a dedicated, last-resort communication system. ⚠️ Watch the full video: bit.ly/3XXlvoH

HENRY CREEL: chooses redemption, ends up surviving the Mind Flayer's abuse. horror / fandomless / au take on the character from stranger things, writer is 21+, (n)sfw & triggers ahead, ms/mv (ships are earned if there's chemistry, he's straight).

Sometimes the market keeps climbing, but experienced traders still feel turbulence ahead. Numbers matter, but AI-driven data can spot shifts before they become headlines. Explore Swing Pilot, 100+ trade suggestions daily. ✈️ #SwingPilot #SwingTrading #StockMarket #Trading #TraderLife

📰 NEWS | October 15, 2025 | Galway Hires Stephen Poitras to Help Advance the High-Grade Estrades Gold and Zinc Project Read the announcement 🔗 stockmkt.info/3KTDokX ___ 🇨🇦 TSXV: GWM | 🇺🇸 OTCQB: GAYMF #GoldStocks

Meet Arik - he's a fallen fae prince turned servant. His anger, his rage for his position is a quiet simmer until the day he can reveal his true self. Intrigued? a.co/d/0c0Aujbb ⬅️ Amazon link for #invisiblesouls #magicmysteryspice #tashairwin #booktok #characterdesign #booksky

"This lesbian has had plenty of girlfriends with penises"

Happy Valentines Day from all your favourite little pals 💘🦖

OFF TO MEXICO!!!! Leaving Cripple Creek Colorado now. 1900 mile drive!! Wish Us Luck!

SMH all yall be big talkin about yo lives, when yall wouldn't last inside this furry ahh, so chill!

I got some video to show off the metallics in my diptych. A4 sized, on thick watercolour paper, created using alcohol markers, pastel pencils & metallic pens. Here's '"Fuck You, Stede Bonnet." And Fuck ICE.' in action. #FandomMarket www.32auctions.com/organization...

🍑🍑🍑

@murielvieux.bsky.social @leejohnson65.bsky.social @thedogsmom.bsky.social @lucy2.bsky.social @pleightx.bsky.social @dawna9.bsky.social WELL, IT'S "DUMB" MONDAY ACROSS TRUMPFUCKISTAN AMERICA #NoKings #NoDictators #NoPedoPresidents #2026Bitches #ProtestThePresident #TrumpEpsteinPedoCoverUp

González Amador, citado a declarar como testigo en la investigación que afecta a Miguel Ángel Rodríguez